r/news • u/reddicyoulous • 7d ago
Phoenix family discovers 5,000 fentanyl pills inside daughter's thrift store toy
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/phoenix-family-discovers-5-000-fentanyl-pills-inside-daughter-s-n12585951k
u/partizan92 6d ago
Toy Story 5 plot leaked
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u/WineNerdAndProud 6d ago edited 6d ago
Deadpool 3: Toy Story
A drug dealer and kingpin is getting young children sent to jail for possession of narcotics, only it's his own private jail where he converts them into mindless mutant enemies.
Deadpool swoops in to kill this guy, free all the kids, then takes roughly 6,645 fentanyl pills and sings either Mambo #5, or Spirit in the Sky in full costume.
Edit: Kissed by a Rose by Seal would also be a good one.
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u/HoraceSchemer 6d ago
Not too far off: https://m.imdb.com/title/tt2452242/
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u/LifesSimpleDarwinism 6d ago
What in the hell did i just watch?! I'm strangely aroused! And will probably binge it! Thanks stranger!
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u/Veldron 6d ago edited 6d ago
Absolutely brilliant show and one hell of a trip. Wonderful mix of genuinely gritty scenes and sinister characters perpetually contrasted by the complete insanity of it all. Fell to the classic curse of being canned by SyFy right in its prime
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u/crappenheimers 6d ago
It's a fantastic show. Just be aware it was cancelled... and I didnt realize it was canceled when I way binging it. Imagine my disappointment when the next episode doesnt show up on the autoplay :(
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u/UnclePhilandy 6d ago
It was a miniseries. They planned originally to do 4 Christmas, Easter they did do and then there were to be 2 more like 4th of July and Halloween. BUT they were never written.
Chris Merloni was EXCELLENT as was Patton Oswalt doing the voice.
It had a very Psych feel to it (comedy wise).
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u/Nice_Bake 6d ago edited 6d ago
Meanwhile another child is very upset that her mother donated her favorite toy, but not for the reason she thinks.
EDIT: These replies are like telling my mom a joke and getting a lecture
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u/OfficeChairHero 6d ago
I felt your edit hard.
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u/handlebartender 6d ago
This is why it took me so long to be casually comfortable telling my mom jokes.
Even then, there would be the unexpected lecture.
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u/somhok 6d ago
I couldnt even talk to my mum at all, without it either turning into a lecture, her asking me to do a million tasks for her or asking about my school work. Now at 18 and moved out, you can guess we have no real relationship, as she knows nothing about me. I feel like the main thing i took away from them, was how not to act as parents lmao
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u/hopefulcynicist 6d ago
I too left home at 18 for similar sounding reasons and didn't have much of a relationship with my mom for years.
I'm pushing 30 now and the older I get the more I realize that her heart was in the right place, even if her methods, execution, and expectations left something to be desired. She was doing the best she could with the time and tools she had.
Only recently have I started working hard to rebuild-- I set some boundaries, learned to say 'no' and generally set an expectation for mutual respect or bust.
Ya only got so many years with em, ya know? I just wish I'd started sooner.
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u/somhok 6d ago
My parents are nigerian and christian. They basically did the bare minimum in everything in my life, apart from education. They loved me based on my achievements. Their love was not unconditional. I will always love them. However it is meaningless to try and amend a relationship that was never there. I have maybe 5% good memories in that house hold and even being there became bad for my mental health. It could have been different if they just saw things from anything but their own perspective, but they didnt want to.
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u/Doomncandy 6d ago
I'm so glad my mother, grandmother and I share the same dark cynical humour.
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u/casteela 6d ago
Same. I don’t bring my humor around my mom because I regret it every single time.
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u/HB1theHB1 6d ago
They need to check the thrift store employees. A cracker barrel in Birmingham was busted running drugs this way years ago. Put it in certain hidden stuffed animals in the gift shop, then have the buyer come in and purchase said toy and overpay the clerk.
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u/Taco_Soup_ 6d ago
This reminds me of Conan O’Brien probably 20 years ago talking about a Long John Silvers getting busted for running a marijuana ring. He said police were tipped off when people actually went to a Long John Silvers.
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u/johnnyscarecrow0126 6d ago
Hush puppies from long John were bomb.
Also, what is taco soup. I want some.
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u/postmodest 6d ago
and those li'l bits skimmed from the fryer. Hghghghghghgh.
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u/baardvark 6d ago
Crunchies! Used to fight my sister for them.
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u/col-fancypants 6d ago
It blew my mind when I learned you could order a "Boat of Crunchies." So I did, and the box of hush puppies. Sea dog heaven. We still have 2-3 open in my area.
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u/rabidbasher 6d ago
Ill fight a motherfucker for some ljs crunchy bits. Haven't lived that life in so many years
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u/DarlingDestruction 6d ago
I don't know if you're serious or not, but here is a really good chicken tortilla soup recipe, which one could argue is basically a crunchy taco in soup form.
https://www.budgetbytes.com/slow-cooker-chicken-tortilla-soup/
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u/LarkspurLaShea 6d ago edited 6d ago
Hehehe, I remember that one. Golden Age Conan.
It was the same time as his joke: "it's been four days since US forces invaded Iraq and reports say that soldiers have run out of cigarettes. Conditions are so dire that some have resorted to smoking actual Camels."
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u/jpark28 6d ago
Has Conan ever left the golden age? He's still hilarious
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u/MarcBulldog88 6d ago
Assuming "Golden Age Conan" refers to his original '90s show, it's identifiable by its brand of humor. It had a lovable low budget vibe to it with absurdist one-off skits and music (anyone remember Three Inch Bees?).
They tried to keep the "In the Year 2000" skit after the year 2000, but it just wasn't the same. Conan is still hilarious and clever, and that's not something that'll change, but the flavor of his shows have definitely changed over time.
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u/wearethehawk 6d ago
Three inch bees, masturbating bear, Triumph, so many good skits
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u/drewer23 6d ago
I went to a LJS one time back in college. The place was empty, all the lights were flickering, there was only one employee working, and I got this weird vibe that the Hash-Slinging Slasher was gonna walk through the door at any moment. Conan's joke makes a lot of sense.
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u/psychopythonmetrist 6d ago
That's pretty smart tbh
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u/SuperHighDeas 6d ago
If they got caught it wasn’t smart enough
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u/JudgeHoltman 6d ago
It's almost always because they rely on junkies not screwing up the system.
You could stash a toy at a goodwill with a green sticker that sells for $1 and inevitably some junkie would walk out without paying for it only to have your entire operation blown up by someone investigating the shoplifter.
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u/thoroakenfelder 6d ago
Never trust a junkie
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u/AnotherClosetAtheist 6d ago
as a dealer
always trust them to be repeat customers!
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u/tlibra 6d ago
True, but don’t trust them on the front. Payday never comes. Sob stories don’t spend.
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u/NotC9_JustHigh 6d ago edited 4d ago
Off, I've got a story about that. Fucking Roy, a couple year ago when I moved to this apartment, he was in a wheel chair recovering from being run over. Eventually I find out he tried to steal crack from his dealer and his dealer ran him over lmfao.
Fast forward to 3 weeks ago, the local dealer is getting questioned by cops out of no where when he has a very legit job and the drug selling is a side hustle mostly to older people. Dealer later find out it was fucking Roy who ratted him out because Roy owed him a bunch of money
from getting fronted weed(even worse) from getting fronted $400 for RENT. Never trust a junkie or even an ex junkie, sorry ex junkies'.→ More replies147
u/falthecosmonaut 6d ago
Ex junkie here. I used to be addicted to heroin and am going on 4 years clean now. I'm not even the same person I was before but I also never robbed anyone and never had shit fronted to me even while I was using. I was probably one of the few junkies who would sit there and just deal with the withdrawals until I had money or until someone was willing to share.
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u/HydrogenButterflies 6d ago
“If you think a crackhead’s payin’ you back, shit, forget it.” -The Notorious B.I.G.
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u/enrtcode31 6d ago
Retired cop here. I flipped many people to snitch for me. Most were addicts. The moment an addict sees that they will spend time in jail for even a small offense and go through withdrawals there they will tell on thier family to get out. Sad but true.
Addiction is a terrible thing. In my opinion it should be a medical issue not a criminal one.
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u/MrsMI1UCAN2 6d ago
Weed being federally legal needs to happen ASAP.
It will solve so many problems.
I've been growing my own for a few years since my state went legal and it legitimately changed my life. I lost 90lbs over that time, went off my blood pressure and anxiety meds, my liver enzymes plummeted to normal.
I'm glad I didn't discover it until age 50 because of the legal issues it could have presented in my life but on the other hand I probably wouldn't have spent 30 years drinking as much as I did, either.
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u/MagnusTheGreat 6d ago
IMO, best way to deal with addiction is to give them a safe area to do their drugs and get help if they need.
If the government supplies them with good stuff and medical professionals that can monitor their doses, they are far less likely to OD or get some disgusting junk in their supply. And then they can also seek help from professionals when they're ready. If they relapse, they also won't be going back to their top doses, cause the people watching them have a better idea of the tolerance and even if they OD, the people watching them can help and save them.
Drug addicts are some seriously vulnerable people and society has failed them way too much. We need to provide them with safe areas or else we might as well just pull the trigger ourselves.
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u/SocialJusticeWizard_ 6d ago
It's not just your opinion, at this point that's basically well understood scientific fact. Denying it is on the scale of antivax and climate denial, it's just more socially acceptable.
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u/Pwnjabba 6d ago
Doesn't matter how smart the idea is because people cant be trusted, often these things are found because a customer or someone involved gets fucked over and talks to the police or something along those lines
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u/OhMaGoshNess 6d ago
It isn't. It is extremely obvious people are being over payed and stuffing cash in pockets. It is a very stupid thing to do.
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u/ggodfrey 6d ago
hands toy to thrift store cashier
“That’ll be $1.99”
pays it and adds a wad of $100 bills to the tip jar
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u/Redwulf67 6d ago
Personally I think food delivery would be one of the easiest and least suspicious method.
Plenty of people order deliveries multiple times a week and no one bats an eye. You can pay for the food with a card, and give a cash tip that doesn't get recorded anywhere for the special sides.
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u/Morningfluid 6d ago
Not if someone else happens to buy said toy.
There's too much room for error and eyes.
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u/sleepyguy- 6d ago
I would probably want the person picking up the drop to be eating lunch while I’m “stocking” the shelves, it’s not like you want the kilo bear on a shelf for a week.
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u/Cruel_Hand_Luke_ 6d ago
"Um, yes, I would like to purchase this stuffed bear."
That will be fifty thousand dollars.
"Here you are"
And ten's your change. Thank you for shopping smart, shop S-mart
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u/JoeSr85 6d ago
Thank you for my teddy bear and here is your $72,349.17, have a good day.
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u/injuniperusveritas 6d ago
Just happened in a Seattle on Sunday, someone found a kilo of cocaine in their thrift shop purchase: https://komonews.com/news/local/woman-finds-kilo-of-cocaine-in-crochet-kit-bought-at-seattle-store
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u/razzamatazz 6d ago
apparently i need to thrift shop more often!
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u/MrsMI1UCAN2 6d ago
At this point in the thread I'm going to start seeing thrift shops and wondering what kind of drugs are moving in and out of there, because I've seen some occupying decent real estate and wonder how they keep going, particularly because of covid when lots of places stopped accepting new donations/inventory.
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u/Yes_hes_that_guy 6d ago
I never thought about it before but thrift shops would be perfect for money laundering. Generally, the biggest problem is having to show that you bought inventory to fulfill the sales that you’re using to wash the dirty money. When you rely on donations for inventory, there’s no proof that you didn’t get the inventory for free that you “sold” in the fake transactions. It just never existed and it would be difficult to prove otherwise unless they had a reason to be investigating you in the first place. You could also “sell your excess donations” in bulk to shell companies.
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u/llminor43 6d ago
Worked at an antique shop and someone put 15k worth of meth inside a coffee pot. A worker bought the coffee pot went home and was in for a surprise. A man walked in few days later and asked for her via first and last name. Very spooky.
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u/Bird-The-Word 6d ago
"Worth" 15k in Cop numbers is like $75 in meth.
I kid, but really they inflate the value sooooo much for the papers, reports, sentence, etc.
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u/Punishtube 6d ago
Yeah I'd put that shit back where I found it and get a return on that. Ain't worth fucking over a junkie for a coffee pot
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u/Wheret0start 6d ago
$15k ain't junkie territory, it's dealer/gang/cartel territory, which is 10x scarier.
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u/llminor43 6d ago
Luckily we had an employee who had 15 year of experience on the swat team so she called him and he confirmed it and they questioned the hell out of the person selling it.
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u/Phobos15 6d ago
From cop to thrift store? Did he testify against another cop?
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u/Ohhigerry 6d ago
No you're not getting it. They meant that the person had 15 years putting coffee pots inside meth for the swat team.
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u/xxBeatrixKiddoxx 6d ago
Yesterday cocaine found in thrift store crochet toy. An entire brick pure coke
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u/Splickity-Lit 6d ago
Mother always knows best, but now the wrong person picked up her drop.
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u/fakeburtreynolds 6d ago
Someone I know got addicted to pills. Would buy toys stuffed with pills from China. Could sneak them through customs pretty easily. This sounds like the exact same thing. Original buyer of this toy probably overdosed and their belongings ended up in this thrift store.
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u/ValyrianJedi 6d ago
I'm betting most people with 5,000 of the things are pretty big proponents of the "don't get high on your own supply" thing though.
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u/JuiceWRLDIsntAlive 6d ago edited 6d ago
That’s a funny thing you just said there. Dealers in 2021 get high on their own supply consistently. It actually compounds the drug problem when the dealers are on drugs
Edit: The only reason I know this stuff is because I used to hate myself. It’s not “cool” to know this stuff. It’s not “fun” to conversate about drug dealing. Your world gets darker every second you think about this shit. Stop DM’ing me.
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u/h0nest_Bender 6d ago
Dealers in 2021 get high on their own supply consistently.
I have generally known two types of dealers.
Type 1 got into selling drugs to make money. They generally don't dip into their own supply.
Type 2 is the drug dealer who figured out how to sell drugs to his/her friends and make enough profit to pay for their own drugs.142
u/[deleted] 6d ago
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u/All_Work_All_Play 6d ago
Tell me you're an alcoholic without telling me you're an alcoholic.
I run a successful tavern.
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u/lisanami 6d ago
the second kind of dealer is the one i think most people here are talking about. These dealers only make back what they earn to buy more drugs for themselves and just enough to sell to make back his money. Does not last.
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u/IAmA_Risky_Click_AMA 6d ago
That's exactly how I got into dealing weed. It was entirely to smoke for free.
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u/HurricaneAlpha 6d ago
I've only ever met type 2. To be fair, I only smoke weed so I'm not dealing with people that deal in other shit.
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u/ValyrianJedi 6d ago
There is a pretty big difference in somebody selling a few grand worth of drugs to afford their own habbit and somebody selling hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of drugs.
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u/wittywalrus1 6d ago
This sounds at least plausible, compared to other explanations here. But of course, who knows.
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u/Mugnath1 6d ago
I'm gonna take a bit of a guess that the original owner was a dealer/consumer and probably o.d'd. Family comes in and donates his possessions, and that includes their drug stash.
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u/Your_acceptable 6d ago edited 6d ago
Was thinking just this, Phoenix is our definitely flooded with Fentynol dealings.
Edit: Fentanyl
Sorry, even my spell check was like: "yeah, I got nothin."
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u/ThrowawayBlast 6d ago
You can always tell which table at the flea market is an estate sale in Florida. Ceramic knick knacks, some kitchen items and fifty books about Jesus.
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u/Shadeauxmarie 7d ago edited 6d ago
So a drug mule was telling the truth and shouldn’t have been killed.
Edit: Top rated comment is about a drug mule.
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u/Tripted 6d ago
Mule: "I swear! The toy with the pills accidentally got donated to Value Village and purchased by a precocious child! Me and my buddy have been engaged in a series of madcap schemes trying to get it back only to be thwarted by the kid and her pet dog each time!"
Cartel Boss: cocks gun "Yeah, sure"
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u/Peeping_thom 6d ago
You’re killing your father, Larry
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u/Merlin-the-Pirate 6d ago
This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps!
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u/dstommie 6d ago
My favorite TV edit ever.
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u/Magus6796 6d ago
My favorite is from scarface. "Where did you get those scars tough guy?...from eating pineapples?"
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u/Jimid41 6d ago
I have had it with these monkey-fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane!
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u/geoffbowman 6d ago
Isn’t that the kid who lives over by the in n out burger? The one flunking social studies?
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u/BloomsdayDevice 6d ago edited 6d ago
Value Village
Hello, fellow PNWerner!
Edit: I don't have the energy to continue to confirm or disconfirm in replies the presence of Value Villages in areas outside of the Pacific Northwest, but I will share my findings with you all:
Value Village/Savers is a chain of thrift stores headquartered in Bellevue, WA, with stores in most of the United States and Canada, as well as Australia (apparently). In the PNW and Canada, they operate under the banner Value Village, except in Quebec, where they are expectedly francophoned (Village des Valeurs). Elsewhere in the US and in Australia, they use the banner Savers.
Outside of the PNW and Canada, the name "Value Village" appears on stores that are, as far as I can tell, unaffiliated with the Savers/VV corporation. So, yes, you may well have a Value Village in Regina or Hamilton, or even a store with the same name (but different corporate ties) in Memphis or Rochester, and I'm sorry for leaving you out!
What I've learned today is humility. I assumed too soon that OP up there was a compatriot of mine, though it's quite likely that they are from some other part of the English (or French!) speaking world. I've also learned that there are comparatively few viable names for a successful thrift store, and that most of them use the words "value" or "save".
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u/toolsoftheincomptnt 6d ago
No no, they still get killed bc oopsie or not, alllllllll that money is gone.
If they were still alive when this news story broke, boy oh boy are they dead now.
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u/LordDongler 6d ago
5000 fentanyl pills are worth close to nothing at production cost. Like 15 cents per pill. Not worth it to kill anyone over
You kill them because they exposed the operation, not because of the money
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u/Swineflew1 6d ago
Bruh, people out here killing other people for cutting them off in traffic, let alone costing them any amount of money or time invested.
I mean, you’re not factoring the opportunity costs of those pills. Sure you lost out in production costs, but you’ve actually lost the street value of those pills too.33
u/itty53 6d ago
Bruh, people out here killing other people for cutting them off in traffic, let alone costing them any amount of money or time invested.
The difference is the people killing over being cut off are fucking stupid and not criminal billionaires.
The guys pushing pills across the oceans are not fucking stupid. They're making money hand over fist. Murder charges bring a lot more heat than a single bag of pills.
Watch some old smugglers do interviews. Stuff gets lost all the time, and they weren't killed. One doc, Cocaine Cowboys, they discuss a shipment of coke getting taken down by DEA in the ocean that was worth something like 40 million dollars. The Columbians were angry thinking the American smugglers stole it. The American smugglers insisted it was a DEA sting. So the Columbians -- being not stupid -- demanded evidence: "Show us the newspaper that reported the big takedown". The news hadn't hit yet so the American smugglers were nervous. The following day an article released on the takedown, they supplied it to the smugglers and the smugglers decided "Sorry for the trouble, that's no problem, we'll send another shipment". End of discussion.
Smugglers accept and expect over half their shipments to fail. It's a numbers game, for every 4 that fails, if one gets through then they're making profit. They can tolerate failure all day long, they can't tolerate a lack of trust. You steal from them, you die, doesn't matter if you stole a single gram. That's a breech of trust. But if they refused to work with anyone who might possibly get arrested or caught, they wouldn't have a business at all.
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u/htownchuck 6d ago
Somewhere in the world a drug dealer is wondering where his shit is at.
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u/[deleted] 6d ago
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u/spikeyfreak 6d ago
The picture in the article is of a glo worm toy. They're pretty big. I'm also really surprised they're still a thing. My little brother had one 35+ years ago.
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u/KuhjaKnight 7d ago
That’s a pretty good RoI. Why are they upset?
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u/Dumpo2012 7d ago
Man, I never find shitloads of drugs stuffed into anything I buy.
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u/Miserable_homey 6d ago
This reminds me of the broken promise of Halloween drugs. I never got any.
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u/Dahhhkness 6d ago
DARE kind of glossed over the concept of unit economics and the fact that drugs cost money. Growing up, I thought I'd be getting smoked up by friendly local dealers all the time, but it turned out to be another cruel lie, like Santa Claus.
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u/JohnDivney 6d ago
There he was, swinging his pimp cane and space truckin' across the playground. He saw me watching him and flashed me a diamond-studded grill. I could see the bulges in his trenchcoat where unimaginable joy awaited. If only he would share. If only he would offer drugs. To me.
My fingers gripped the chain link fence of the baseball backstop. "Firss one's fwee?" I still had that little kid lisp in the second grade.
"Don't believe everything you see in movies, kid." He shot back as he did a pirouette and moonwalk.
A tear formed in the corner of my eye.
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u/uppercrustbloodlust 6d ago
no lie! they always depicted junkies laying in alleyways just itching to inject unsuspecting kids with syringes filled with smack.. then i get strung out and spend the next 15 years working what seems like two full time jobs scheming on money to not be sick. what a scam!
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u/Alwaysfavoriteasian 6d ago
Just like the time I was told LSD could get me high twice. Once when I do the drug than a flashback which is very similar to the first time. It never happened though. Just more LIES from Big LSD. -Norm McDonald paraphrased of course.
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u/7788445511220011 6d ago
I like how afaik he's never really touched drugs or much booze, but in his "memoir" he's constantly doing morphine. And shitting on Adam Egert.
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u/boomshiki 6d ago edited 6d ago
I’m reminded of this old lady I heard about over the radio a bunch of years back. She bought some shitty Corolla or something used from a dealership, but the passengers window didn’t work. She just puts up with it for years before finally taking it in to get it looked at. They removed the panel to the door and found it PACKED with vaccume sealed bags of weed. It started a slew of listeners calling in to muse if it was still smokable
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u/Reloaded9mm 6d ago
So smoke weed and get vaccinated at the same time. That sounds like a huge money maker to me. What does it vaccinate against?
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u/TobaccoIsRadioactive 6d ago
See, this is why I always insist on eating any toys my kids get before letting them play with them. Can’t risk letting my kids get all the good drugs.
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u/mikechi2501 6d ago
They are upset since they stupidly reported this "find" and had the Feds descend upon their house and tear through their personal finances, interrogate them for days and rip open all the other kid toys.
If they were smart they would have kept their mouth shut and continued letting their daughter step on that smack and push out that Fentanyl. Bitch was a big seller at the sandbox. Billy is going to be hella dopesick come Wednesday.
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u/imanAholebutimfunny 6d ago
because the daughter wanted to sell them and keep all the profit
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u/Kringeworthy 6d ago
I'm gonna pop some tabs only got 20 dollar in my pocket
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u/thegigsup 6d ago edited 6d ago
Is that... is that what that lyric means? How tf did I miss that? For years I’ve wondered why it was censored on the radio, but I literally thought the lyrics were “I’m gonna pop some tags” and couldn’t figure out what was bad about that. Didn’t care enough to Google and dang.
Edit: wtf no you’re just making a great joke. Will leave this comment up as a receipt for how tragic I am.
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u/MermaidZombie 6d ago
No, it's definitely not what it meant, if you're being serious. The comments you're replying to is a joke and it actually is "tags."
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u/potatohats 6d ago
I guess the real question is, why was your radio station censoring "tags"?
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u/thegigsup 6d ago
Oklahoma is equally as tragic as my comment lol. Some Christian was probably feeling wild that day.
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u/WineNerdAndProud 6d ago
I'm in the midwest and I feel this in my frozen soul.
Interestingly, I served time at a Catholic School where we had dances (at which the teachers actually said "leave room for Jesus" when kids danced together), and yet they played that 90's R&B song about dancing with a boner at every single dance.
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u/Cougar_9000 6d ago
They think its code for stealing. Its not he was just making fun of Kanye for extravagantly spending money on clothing. Mack has to "pop tags" at the thrift store because he only has $20
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u/OneOfTheOnly 6d ago
Think it's just about expensive clothes in general my dude, got nothing to do with Kanye
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u/Lights_Out_Luthor 6d ago
Maybe the owner OD’d and left behind this secret stash which was donated along with other belongings of the deceased.
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u/yesiamveryhigh 6d ago
*Dealer puts 10.000 pills in toy.
Family: “5,000”
Police: “2,000”
Chief: “500”
Inventory: “100”
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u/jabberwagon 6d ago
Good on the parents for cleaning and inspecting that shit before giving it to their kid. If the child had found the bag and thought "oooh, candy!" this story would have a very different tone.
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u/crokinoleworld 6d ago
There's an old movie called Wait Until Dark. Audrey Hepburn. Heroin in a doll.
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u/free_billstickers 6d ago
Somewhere macklemore is cutting open all if his thrift store buys looking for a new revenue stream
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u/toejamandtoast 6d ago
There’s a hole in the desert and at the bottom is the man who made this mistake.
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u/RelevantBossBitch 6d ago
"Family finds retirement plan inside child's toy"
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u/supaphly42 6d ago
Police? Yes, I'd like to report something, I found 10 thou, err, I mean 5 thousand pills in this toy!
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u/yesitsyourmom 6d ago
I recommend no one ever buys a thrift store stuffed animal. Those things always look nasty.
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u/starmartyr11 6d ago
Funny enough I ordered a very specific stuffed toy from China on Amazon and it showed up with a hole ripped open in it's back...
It took months longer to arrive than it was meant to already and it was a very late gift so we kept it and had it fixed; but there were many jokes made about the toy having been violated and having been used as a drug mule, for sure
I believe it was maybe overzealous customs agents, but who really knows..
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u/seriousnotshirley 6d ago
I find this a really interesting way to move drugs. Imagine this: the idea is that the dealer donates toys to a thrift store, the buyer knows what toys they are supposed to buy from said thrift store but they didn't make the buy in time. There's no deal going down to get caught up in, and if you're smart you don't even touch any of it, you just arrange for other people to donate toys for you.
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u/greatshock5 6d ago
This is a bad plan because thrift stores like Goodwill move their stuff around from store to store.
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u/mirandaleecon 6d ago
They also throw TONS of their donations into the trash.
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u/Jrea0 6d ago
Ive seen broken toys and stained underwear at the thrift store near me. If those made the cut to sell I can only imagine what people donated that the thrift store threw away.
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u/mirandaleecon 6d ago
I think it all depends on the store and the knowledge of people processing donations. Some of those people don’t give a shit because they are paid slave wages and some just don’t know the value of things.
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u/RakeNI 6d ago
Yep. Volunteered at an Oxfam here in the UK and there were occasionally some lazy cunts in there that were in either trying to get work experience as a teenager, or their mothers were forcing them to do it, or some other reason, and they'd just not bother to check most shit, dropping it into either pile (keep or throw) at a moments glance.
Also, fuck the people donating stained underwear and clothes with fist-sized holes in them. Charity shops have this stereotype of being filled with scuffed, broken and ripped items and clothes, but in reality if you actually go into them, the people checking the clothes and toys are total puritans and will throw stuff out (to be recycled) even if it has a tiny finger sized hole in one of the pockets. Almost everything in there is in good-as-new condition and its priced at probably a tenth of the original.
I got the entire Game of Thrones book set for £1 as an example.
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u/StrangeLikeNormal 6d ago
I work at a thrift store and trust me you truly don’t!! Never found a fentanyl teddy bear, but we’ve found crack, an entire brick of weed, needles, a loaded gun, dead animals, human teeth, etc. it’s wild.
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u/seriousnotshirley 6d ago
The big ones do but there are plenty of small ones.
If I were doing it I’d have some inside folks to work with as well.
Yes, my plan is half baked but only because I don’t have a need to flesh out the plan completely because I’m definitely not using thrift stores as a mule. I’m confident I could fully bake this plan.
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u/worrymon 6d ago
because I’m definitely not using thrift stores as a mule
Ok, then what are you using as a mule?
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u/duhmonstaaa 6d ago
Personally, I like to use the offspring of a horse and a donkey.
But I’m somewhat of a traditionalist.
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u/HandHoldingClub 6d ago
Too great of a risk of losing product.
There's easier contactless methods of transferring products.
Off the top of my head you could get a good lock and have 2 keys or combinations. Person A puts it in a gym bad and locks it at the gym. Person B shows up later and picks it up.
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u/uncleclifford 6d ago
Definitely not a deal. This probably happened from a landlord cleaning out a rental.
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u/caveman19923 6d ago
Most likely what happened is the guy ordered these on the dark web. I’ve had cocaine shipped to me wrapped in a rice and stuffed instead a teddy bear. I think the person got it in the mail probably went to jail to or died maybe over overdosed but the family donated a nice toy they found in the their sons belongings. And the new family bought it from the thrift store
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u/SantainSeptember 6d ago
Yeah this is a scooby doo plan, when they could just get a person to move it.
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u/Nuf-Said 6d ago
Thank God the child didn’t find and eat one of the pills. It could have easily killed her
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u/dlini 6d ago
Yup. My cousins and I found a VERY large bottle of blue pills in a backyard doll house. We played “candy store”, like Willie Wonka. And yes, we ate them. Nearly all of them.
When an adult came to find us, the fun was most certainly over. I had never seen a look like that on an adults face before (sheer horror and panic). And never had I ever, been thrown into a car and raced to the hospital.
So, as the ER doctor pumped air into my stomach, I cried because it hurt so much, my cousins started vomiting on their own, without the painful air (yes, I still hold that grudge). Then we all got to drink black “milkshakes”(charcol).
What we children didn’t know at the time was that the house was formerly owned by a dentist. The pills turned out to be flouride. We were all fine in the end, but I never took a flouride tab again (they used to make us do that in elementary school and at the dentist).
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u/MewtwoStruckBack 6d ago
Whenever someone turns over drugs to authorities, they should be given a certain percentage of street value for doing so, I'd say 50%. (This should also be the case for any "DEA Take-Back" days where police have setups for people to bring prescription medication that's no longer needed.)
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u/sunnytimes68 6d ago
i like the last paragraph .. "In 2015, a New Jersey mom bought a $500 “handmade” mermaid doll filled with cocaine from Etsy. Investigators later determined that the Etsy shop based in Alabama used mer-baby dolls as a front for smuggling drugs." ..
fuck i hope it was full of cocaine for that price.
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u/Captcha_Imagination 6d ago
What is one of these pills worth? I think you can cut a lot of heroin with one pill.
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u/Ffffqqq 6d ago
These pills are essentially "cut" oxycodone pills. They weigh about 100 mg and contain 1-2 mg of fentanyl. They cost pennies to make, get sold in bulk for a few dollars a pop, and the real product they are counterfeiting sells for upwards of $30 retail on the streets. There's a DEA report that shows the average pill contained 1.7 mg, ~588k pills from a kilo of fentanyl that could cost as low as 20k
https://www.drugsdata.org/results.php?search_field=all&s=M30
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u/Powderstones 6d ago
Italian guy in a tracksuit shows up: There’s been a little mixup, I’m gonna need ya daughta’s toys ma’am
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u/TheOtherJeff 6d ago
Police estimate the street value of the drugs at $5,000,000,000
/s
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u/PopPopPoppy 6d ago
They'd probably say $150,000 (30x5000) but ARV is $25,000 - $75,000
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u/laszlo 6d ago
There is no fucking way I would have called the cops if I found that. Not saying I would have kept it either. But absolutely would not invite police into my home with 5000 pills no matter how innocently it got there.
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u/literallytwisted 6d ago
Considering it's AZ and there's a lot of cartel activity I definitely wouldn't want the media publicising my name. I also wouldn't necessarily trust the local authorities there based on personal experience, Drug smuggling is the largest business in that state and you never know who's getting paid.
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u/todtown 6d ago
And AGAIN the baby goes free. When are we EVER going to learn!